Here at the DUI Foundation, we’re excited to partner with Carrie Armstrong, with the How To Be A Sober Girl blog. You can check out her blog here. Over the next thirty days, she has committed to a How To Be A Sober Girl 30 Day Kickstart campaign and we’ll be sharing her stories right here.
And without any more time, here’s Day Six:
When I was drinking and desperately unhappy I wanted to stop so much. i had a few attempts in my early twenties that were utterly useless. Because I could effortlessly talk myself back into Alcohol abuse. So I did.
When I finally did stop drinking, I was able to do it by refusing to engage with my brain in the endless cycle of persuasion back to the bottle. Instead of trying to logic my way to another drinking session. I simply put up a brick wall of words that my mind could not get past.
I had this conversation. On a loop. Sometimes every few minutes. For at least 10 months. It went like this.
Brain: Right. Let’s go get some drinks
Me: I don’t know why.
And it bloody well worked! My brain couldn’t engage in an argument I was no longer willing to have. Plus it was the truth. I honestly did not know why I could not control my drinking. I didn’t understand it at all. I could not explain. Could not justify without getting defensive or going into denial. Both avenues that led back to drinking. I did not want to wrestle this thought to the ground and beat it into submission. Did not want to navel gaze. I was bored and desperate for change. I didn’t even care why it was that I could not drink normally. I just didn’t want to do it any more.
So I didn’t examine my issues. I didn’t wring my hands and obsess over the why’s.
I just stopped. I just didn’t know. It was just as simple as that.
Try it. Practice this conversation with your brain. Do it for a really, really long time.
Feel the truth of it set you free.
Have a lovely day.